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Bored of the Rings by Henry N C Beard Douglas Charlotte Brand new Mall and Har Kenney

Bored of the Rings by Henry N Beard and Douglas C Kenney the Har

$21

Bored of the Rings by Henry N Beard and Douglas C Kenney the Har

Bored of the Rings is a parody of JRR Tolkien#39;s The Lord of the Rings by Henry N. Beard and Douglas C. Kenney, who later founded National Lampoon. It was published in 1969 by Signet for the Harvard Lampoon. From the back cover: A Statement From the Authors About This Lampoon Edition: This paperback edition, and no other, has been published solely for the purpose of making a few fast bucks. Those who approve of courtesy to a certain other living author will not touch this gobbler with a ten-foot battle-lance. -Henry N. Beard, Douglas C. Kenney

“Never have I laughed so hard at any other book. The Harvard Lampoon#39;s BORED OF THE RINGS is unquestionably a comic masterpiece as well as a brilliant parody of JRR Tolkien#39;s famous THE LORD OF THE RINGS trilogy. A gem of irreverence... filled with an incredible menagerie of mad characters including lustful Elfmaidens and a roller-skating dragon. A side-splitting swipe at the Eternal Quest and the castles, wizards and other folderol of quot;ancient” lore...a CATCH-22 for lovers of the days of yore.” -Book Nook, Harvard Daily News
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First Signet Printing, September 1969, 16th Printing

Bored of the Rings by Henry N. Beard and Douglas C. Kenney

Condition: Good. Reading use with some edge wear, chips, and bumps. Tanning. Back cover has title sticker. Some soiling and handling wear.
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Table of Contents:
Foreword
Prologue-concerning Boggies
It#39;s My Party and I#39;ll Snub Who I Want To
Three#39;s Company, Four#39;s a Bore
Indigestion at the Sign of the Goode Eats
Finders Keepers, Finders Weepers
Some Monsters
The Riders of Roi-Tan
Serutan Spelled Backward Is Mud
Schlob#39;s Lair and Other Mountain Resorts
Minas Troney in the Soup
Be It Ever So Horrid

Snippet:
quot;Do you like what you doth see ... ?quot; said the voluptuous elf-maiden as she provocatively parted the folds of her robe to reveal the rounded, shadowy glories within. Frito#39;s throat was dry, though his head reeled with desire and ale.

She slipped off the flimsy garment and strode toward the fascinated boggie unashamed of her nakedness. She ran a perfect hand along his hairy toes, and he helplessly watched them curl with the fierce insistent wanting of her.

“Let me make thee more comfortable,” she whispered hoarsely, fiddling with the clasps of his jerkin, loosening his sword belt with a laugh. “Touch me, oh touch me,” she crooned.

Frito#39;s hand, as though of its own will, reached out and traced the delicate swelling of her elf-breast, while the other slowly crept around her tiny, flawless waist, crushing her to his barrel chest.

“Toes, I love hairy toes,” she moaned, forcing him down on the silvered carpet. Her tiny, pink toes caressed the luxuriant fur of his instep while Frito#39;s nose sought out the warmth of her precious elf-navel.

“But I#39;m so small and hairy, and ... and you#39;re so beautiful,” Frito whimpered, slipping clumsily out of his crossed garters.

The elf-maiden said nothing, but only sighed deep in her throat and held him more firmly to her faunlike body. “There is one thing you must do for me first,” she whispered into one tufted ear.

quot;Anything,quot; sobbed Frito, growing frantic with his need. quot;Anything!”

She closed her eyes and then opened them to the ceiling. “The Ring,” she said. quot;I must have your Ring.”

Frito#39;s whole body tensed. quot;Oh no, that! Anything but... that.”

quot;I must have it,” she said both tenderly. “I must have the Ring!”

Frito’s eyes blurred with tears and confusion “I can#39;t,” he said. “I mustn#39;t!quot;

But he knew resolve was no longer strong in him. Slowly, the elf-maiden#39;s hand inched toward the chain in his vest pocket, closer and closer it came to the Ring Frito had guarded so faithfully.

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Bored of the Rings by Henry N Beard and Douglas C Kenney the Har

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